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We all know kids need to take naps. I’m sure there’s scientific data around the interweb somewhere, but I have 3 kids so I’m not really into the whole giving-a-shit-about-finding-scientific-data right now. We know kids need to take naps because you can watch them turn from Dr. Jeckel to Mr. Dick in about 5 seconds flat when they are tired. Now, I love a bit of excitement in my life as much as the next gal, but I don’t feel reliving the Exorcist everyday at 3 o’clock is something I can live with.

So, my 4-year-old takes an afternoon nap. And all was right with the universe.

Until recently.

I’m finding motherhood to be a give and take between the best and healthiest options for my children, and the things I need to do to stay sane up in this bitch.

Some examples:

My kids eat healthy food but by industry standards, probably watch too much TV.

My oldest has an extensive after school schedule: sports, religious education, piano lessons… but when he’s not eating or doing homework he plays Minecraft like it’s his job – they really should pay him.

I’m sure I drink too much wine, but it’s my thing. It keeps me sane in a house full of madness…. And Mommy needs her thing.

But now… now, a recent study has been published in Archives of Disease in Childhood and has found that children who nap during the day after the age of 2 often suffer from poorer sleep quality later in life.

What in the actual fuck?

Let me get this straight, the coveted afternoon nap, the thing that keeps my household in harmonious symmetry, might be detrimental to my child in the future?

I call bullshit. You know what will be detrimental to his future? His personality when he doesnt’ get an afternoon nap. Because that shit is not gonna fly around here. Listen close, genius scientists, I’m not giving up nap time, not until you pry it from my cold, unmanicured, overtired hands. You have taken my hopes for a thin waist, my dreams of a brain that can remember more than 2 things at a time, but the nap? No. Not now. Never.

Right now, we need nap time. We need it like we need air, so maybe I’ll apologize in 20 years when he has problems sleeping, but right now? I’m not ending the nap, anytime soon.

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10 Thoughts on “The Truth About Nap Time

  1. Screw the archives!

  2. Emily Parsons 🙂

  3. I call bullshit too. It varies by kid. My daughter napped well into preschool. My son dumped them when he was about 2. Perhaps not coincidentally, that’s when my wine intake went up. 😉

  4. I think scientists just make shit up anymore. Everything is bad for now, even naps?!?!? Screw that . Mine are 555 & 7 and on they still take naps. I’m 34ish and take naps with em

  5. This is complete BS. My 4-year-old is almost 5 and he still naps at least couple times week. The “sleep scientists” all used to say that napping made them geniuses and I’m sticking with that hypothesis.

  6. MOMMY NEEDS THE NAP. They need to back the hell off.

  7. Naps are like a woman on her period….no matter what, your damned if you do and damned if you don’t…….give her ice cream, she eats it and feels fat; forget the ice cream and she murders you in your sleep… give your kid a nap, they stay up later; don’t give them a nap, they turn in heathens, or gremlins

  8. There’ll be a study with completely opposite findings sometime soon. Drink to that (in advance).

  9. That’s just crazy talk.

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