The little people are everywhere. They surround me. I spend 20 hours a day making sure they are alive to see tomorrow. Some days are easier than others: school days, the day my husband put the baby gates on the stairs, the day the baby and the 4-year-old napped at the same time. Some days… not so good: the day the baby discovered the toilet bowl, the day the 9-year-old forgot his homework at school, the day all I wanted was a shower (and I didn’t get it).
My patience wanes as the sun sets. I go from Mary Poppins to Cruella De Vil in an instant. All of a sudden the questions asked of me get more ridiculous, and I throw out the No’s like a major league pitcher on opening day. “But WHHYYY MOOMMMYYY?”
Because I said so.
It really is the most ridiculous phrase around. Because I said so? What kind of stupid shit is that? All this time I spend with my children, reading to them, playing with them, building things with them… what I want is to create thinkers; little people with brains who will grow up to be men with brains. And then I lose my patience because the day is long, their requests are limitless and all that work goes right out the window.
Because I said so.
As if, instantly, all of them have become little Veruca Salts… “I want an Oompa Loompa NOW!” and instead of using my mind, “Honey, you can’t have an Oompa Loompa, because they are mythical beings that only exist in the movies and literature, and where would he sleep?” I give them a whole lot of, “No. Because I said so.”
Because I’m tired. Because I’m over having to explain every decision I make to someone who’s 4 foot tall. Because I’m too lazy to too busy or too over all of this to make/assist/adhere to whatever you want, the moment you want it.
So, right now? The answer is no.
Because I said so.
You’ll have better luck asking for the same ridiculous thing in the morning.
Unless you keep me up all night…